I went in to a coffee shop (not my regular place) for my daily decaf. On the counter were individually wrapped baked items. I picked one up, looked at it, and thought about how it would taste. Suddenly I realized that as a food addict, I was holding and looking at CRACK. I got my coffee and got out, by the grace of God.
Once outside, I thought about Dr. Vera Tarman’s lecture on the brain chemistry of a food addict, and I realized that going in to that shop and picking up the cake was like a drug addict going to a crack den. If a recovering drug addict told me he was going to a crack den to visit friends or to have coffee, I would expect he would be back doing drugs pretty soon.
This is a difficult problem because food is everywhere.
The crack dens of food are in every neighborhood. Even to get abstinent food I have to go to the grocery store-also a crack den. I cook for and feed my family, so there is crack in my house. If I go to a restaurant or a social gathering, food is all around me. I went to a home goods store to buy a food scale and there was crack in that store too. CRACK! CRACK !
I have been in denial about the effect being around food and looking at food has on my brain. I thought that as long as I don’t eat it, I am fine. But it is clear to me now that this is not true.
I plan to talk with people with long term abstinence about how to avoid the “crack dens” and to work with my sponsor take steps to minimize my exposure to the foods that will kill me. Even being around them is dangerous. I am definitely NOT going to the coffee shop anymore!